basahin mo ako ng pag asa

Dear M,

You are my first valentine date, I really never expected that. I told myself not to repeat the mistake that I have made but I couldn't. Remember before we went out, I kept telling you I'm not playing around but after spending a whole night with you, you really moved me, you changed my mind in just a few hours. Your smile, the way you talk, the way you share are all still clear in my mind.You said you will be back on 20/3 and will celebrate my birthday but where are you now? We just knew and it's just a beginning of our chapter and you have gone disappeared. Your sudden appearance has changed my perception. I know we both have our own limitations to contact or meet but I'm fine because we both are busy people. Is it because of I asked that silly question? I hope you know how I feel. I wasn't questioning your loyalty. Please a word or any reply from you will do. I don't want to be like those who wait stupidly for their lovers. If you think you have made quick decision and you feel regret, just tell me because it's better to tell me earlier than dragging my time and wasting my energy. I have not given up on you. I don't want to disturb u by sending u those texts and getting no reply. I 'd rather see or hear yourself admitting and telling me your answer than waiting zero reply.

                                                                                                                                             Love, I

我回来了

我回来了，我学会了更珍惜自己的风俗，所以决定开始使用华语。虽然华语不是很好，可是至少我在尝试。

     这短短的失踪，我经历了一段不愉快的生活；家庭、爱情和工作。高六后，我没继续深造；成绩也不是很理想，开始真正的进入社会。

 爱情： 不要求它，让它自己来。我经历了一段随时能毁掉我人生的爱。小时候，大人说的对；别相信网络上的人，照片可是假的。我就是那位幸运者。 分手后，各走各的；那是最好，可是他不要。他缠着我不放，欺负我、侮辱我，您知道那种感受吗？！你唯能选择呆在家里，到现在我宁愿工作也不肯出去。因为他好厉害，他认识万人，所以他讲什么，大家都会信他。我想把他删掉可是我不能因为我不想成为像他过去的几位，离开了他几年，依然漂流在他脑海。我不要仇，我只求无，无事就好。

家庭：再继续。。。

Letter

I miss gym. seriously, miss all the crazy training lessons, motivation by my trainer. I hope to get back there asap, hope everything recovers asap. Don't forget me my daddy trainer!!!=)

xoxo
Ivan

Just Can't Get Enough

My aunt just introduced two Vietnamese girls to work as part-time waitress during Chinese New Year. We were all worried because we scared that pervert Bangladesh guy who always thinks he is attractive will disturb these innocent girls. So, we tried to block him to see them but who knew he came out to get some rice( must be some idiots in the kitchen told him ) However, my mum and aunty advised them not to mix with him. Phew! I'm keeping my fingers crossed and praying that these girls won't fall into his trap like my stupid Cambodian maid did. "Hope GODS have eyes" This guy just can't get enough with girls.

'People Reviews'

Alright I said I want to be an active blogger. Let me start off with this

Lakoda Rayne is the topic today.

Lakoda Rayne is a girl band from X FACTOR USA. They came in the competition as solo artist (Paige, Cari, Hayley and Dani) but they only made it to the bootcamp. The judges gave them a lifeline which is put them together as a group . The group performed 'Born This Way' in their first ever performance as a group which was very beautiful and very country version.

1st Performance

Then, it was announced that the newly formed girl band is a finalist. It was obviously for sure that they were going to be a country band when they performed 'Come On Eileen'. They received positive reviews from the first live show like Simon & L.A. Reid said there is a gap in the market for this group and they would be giving a world wide contract.
In the next show, their mentor, Paula Abdul made a mistake by giving a ballad song called 'Landslide' where they were beautifully dressed like prom queen but Simon called them weird and L.A. was confused about their genre in the industry.

Landslide

However, that didn't make them landing into the bottom two until the next week where they performed a country song by Keith Urban. They were saved by the judges and stayed in the competition for another two weeks.
Their last performance on X FACTOR was on THANKSGIVING with their own version of 'You Belong With Me'. They were eliminated as they received the lowest amount of votes.

My thought:
Lakoda Rayne is definitely my favorite to win but I knew they won't go long in this competition as they were "REJECTED" in the girls' category. All four beautiful girls with beautiful voices, where can we find girls like them anymore?

I think Americans made a mistake for not voting for them to stay longer; do we still see country girl band now? I don't think so. These girls have great futures. Besides, I would also like to blame Paula for not being a supportive mentor, we could see her asking the audience to vote for Josh Krajik but did we see her persuading people to vote for her last group in her category?!! We could only see her saying: You are greatful! You made me so proud! You've proven to me! What is wrong with this mentor? I personally like them not only bcoz of the looks but the voices, it's something very unique; or maybe their song choices. I love their performance on the ROCK's week which is a mash up of ''Your Love" / "Go Your Own Way''. They sounded amazing.

Rock's week

I also love their version of 'You Belong With Me' on thanksgiving, it was definitely the simplest covered version of the song. However they were eliminated on that week.

Last performance on X FACTOR

One thing I found out interesting about the group and the show is the week where the judges critiqued them, they were never in the bottom two but the week where the judges praised them, they were in the bottom two. You can check it out on YOUTUBE. Americans definitely made a mistake by sending them home as they are four good soloists too. If the world could vote, they would have become the winner for sure.

Revamp

What can i do with this old and unread blog???
I need to polish up everything maybe do some show or music reviews again??? Galaxie has revamped their magazines for years and i think i have to too.

Dreams off

I have a lot of dreams..oops had a lot of dreams...
I'm stuck here... Turning 20 this April but i still got beaten by mum. My family never understands me. It hurts when mum beat me =(
No more dream come true or what. I just wasted my STPM but i had the greatest time in MBS. No more university ....gonna work 4ever...

I'm heartbroken.
I've lost a lot of friends. I called them Best Friends; I was completely wrong especially two who I really treated them like real brothers. Someone who I almost argued with my S.I.S over them.
I really love Lakoda Rayne from X Factor USA. I really love these girls but they were all eliminated. Anyway still love them especially this song.
Here is my own version of lyrics.

You're on the phone
with your fan favorite ‒ she's upset
he's having something
about something that I don't
'cause she/he doesn't get your humor like I do.
I'm in my room ‒ it's a typical Tuesday night.
I'm listening to the kind of music he doesn't like.
He'll never know your story like I do.

But he looks better
I look normal
He's club captain
And I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
That what you're looking for has been here the whole time.

If you could see
That I'm the one
Who understands you
Been here all along
So why can't you see
you are my brother

Prom

I'm very happy, it's been so many months and i still can't forget this. My biggest achievement of life - won the prom. I'm the prom king of MBS . can't believe i did it. It was amazing seriously, not only Sean and I made a very memorable prom night for everyone, all those works paid off. I also won the prom king. One thing I regret is I didn't bring my camera at prom, so I didn't take a lot of photos. I definitely love MBS. It gives me everything i didnt have in my previous school, gonna leave this school soon, I don't know how I would feel; just can't imagine. I've known the results of my STPM, I 've known that I won't pass but I have to say I enjoyed being a part of MBS.

i 'm having the worst feeling of the world. i shud be patient, i shud be quiet.....i need to change

I don't respect this couple

i feel so bad now!
I had the best attitude in the shop just now, i handled things well as Aunty Luan was at the counter too. I didn't even feel frustrated even though the orders kept coming in. But they couldn't, taking bills, getting signatures for the cards; so I went to help. Everything was fine until that fucking bitch yelled at me, I was trying to help as I could handle. I hate people yelling at me when I try to help or can handle thing well. So did her husband backing her, even insulted me. I feel embarrassed, I got scolded by my workers with no reason bcoz that bitch is his wife?! I kept quiet as I knew if I replied, troubles will come. My mum will feel even more worried, I want them to enjoy there. But nobody trusts me!
I just can't stand how his husband reacted just now, backing her, even said walk out from the shop blablabla....these people are horrible people, remember when they need help from us???

Oh life again, mum and Irene are at New York!! OMG!!!
OK, I have heard a lot of dramas in my class, can't believe it! They say they is spy or what, hope it's not me, I know what I'm doing, 100% not me bcoz I sound like like bitch but actually I'm a slut. I feel safe for that spot!!! can't wait to find out!!!

Rovers

I'm so proud of myself, I made this!

I'm Rebecca Black

I'm pretty disappointed at myself. I love music, i love singing, but I can't sing; I don't know how to utilize my 'stomach' to sing. I heard they want to do some music covers on youtube. I asked them to allow me to join but now, I'm thinking of quitting bcoz I don't really see thing among us, it hurts me. Of course, I won't turn down their offer, it's just something with me. I need someone to talk to me about this, I don't want to give up music. I just want to wish the best.

make it happen

Everytime when I walk into the gym, I see people, young people or I would probably say ROOKIES! Some of them are really awesome, they have the heart. But I wonder do they have the heart like me??? It's not that I want to brag but I have to be selfish. How much do they want it? Do they really want it or are they just doing this for some objective? My dream is much more important than them; they might just want to be Mr. Bodylicious or win some competitions but I seriously have a different dream. My dream came when I have some health issue which I think was an obstacle. Now, I 'm still having it but I have gone through a lot of challenges. I'm gonna keep going to make things happen!

TOUGH ENOUGH

Watching Tough Enough has definitely given me a lot of motivation to be a tougher and stronger athlete in real life. I thought it was going to be very boring like the past but it wasn't boring in this season. I pretty enjoyed the past few episodes. However, I'm very sad that current Miss USA, Rima was eliminated last week. It was said that she was the weakest among the contestants. Stone Cold said that her mind kept telling her keep going but her body kept saying NO! But what I think is she was really tough in the show, she has a lot of gut on the show, totally proven that she is strong and beautiful! Now, there are only 2 girls; of course I hope Christina wins, but can she? There are so many guys!!! Seriously the guys didn't impress me!!!

This show has changed me in life, especially when I'm in the gym. The words are all in my heart, so it's gonna help me no matter what! I really feel happy and proud now that I'm so into sports. I know it's a bit late but at least I have done what people expected I will never do. I 'm really Tough Enough!!!

Katharine McPhee makes me cry

Terrified is a nice song by Katharine McPhee. A song that makes me think of something. Something can be good, bad, happy, sad.... to be continued

Camp fire

i ruined the camp fire , people will hate me...:(sorry guys

It's a waste of time, energy and money

Some people don't appreciate free thing. The stories all start here, I was not the original sixth form roster for the Games. I was asked to substitute Esther as she had a talent competition in K.L. So, I just accepted it. Everything went smooth until that Saturday. Around 50 people attended the orientation games ~ WTF!!! We expected more than 100 people, so everything had to be changed. The games, challenges......everything CHANGED

There was an id...............................
[STORIES CENSORED/CANCELLED/CONSTRICTED]

At the end, some people got changed and went home with prizes!!! The committee had to clean up the school area. Some things were not used that day, so we put it at a side. Although I was not the item incharge's person, I did bring a lot of balloons there because I knew something. I kept them in a pink plastic along with my dad's decoration stuff bcoz those things belonged to my dad. There were also beautiful ribbons, tapes, scissors...But I don't know which idiotic person threw that plastic away!!! He could see that as everything was new! It's not because of money or what, it's that I brought these things and it was not used, and it was wasted. ARGHHH.... It's such a waste of ....everything!

Ruined

i dunno why I keep thinking that I was the one messed up the whole games. I shouldn't have helped, but Esther is like a sister to me, a friend who really understands my feelings, that's why I helped her. It all went wrong, it was not what I expected, I just ruined everything that day.